[ he's been ignoring and suppressing his body's hunger cues for nearly 150 years. he has no idea how he's supposed to start listening to them again, or when, to what degree... he's not made for this anymore. ]
well, now if you stop when you get full the worst thing you'll do is kill every box of cereal you've ever met. the stakes are a little different. have you tried? you know. paying attention to when you're full?
you can't look like an idiot in front of me. how many times have you seen me be an idiot? lets take dinner in my room and i'll walk you through it. and if i laugh at you, you can. i don't know. throw a pillow at my head? is that good, human revenge?
on the other hand, it's not really a yes or no answer, to a question as complicated as that. it takes her a minute to text back, because she's thinking about, because she knows what damon wants to hear and knows that isn't what she wants to say. not because it isn't true, but because it isn't the full truth, not wholly.
eventually, )
your vampirism was never the problem. it was how you used it.
( no, she doesn't want that. what does she want? well — that's the question, isn't it? )
he didn't let you die. that's what happened. so what are you going to do with that? die or keep living?
( you'll leave me if you die, she thinks. the selfish first instinct of an inherently selfish person. but he's entitled to a decision without her guilt weighing him — she's entitled to hers, too. )
( — regardless, and maybe just because she hopes manifesting damon in her room works with the siren song of both food and a promise, elena gets dinner brought up to her room. she sweet talks the house staff too, buddies up with a few of the server girls, and tells them to bring up a wide array of stuff — whatever they've got, she's willing to try it. well. maybe they don't get a lot of requests like that, or maybe they're unused to house guests being so nice to them. whatever the case, she accidentally ordered a whole feast just for damon, her bed laid out in covered dishes that a single serving tray at the foot of her bed couldn't fit. well.
he'll definitely get full, that's for sure.
thumb nail bitten, she waits. does not stare at the door, does not pass go, does not do anything but watch the meal get steadily colder the longer he takes. is this pathetic? she feels a little pathetic. )
[ he's not late on purpose, exactly, it's just, you know. there's a lot he's doing right now, he's got a lot going on. doing dinner with the girl who just lied to him about being able to love him is a bit lower on the priority list than making sure he doesn't rapidly age and die if one of the frankly too many vampires in the manor gets their fangs too close to his neck. by the time he gets to elena's room, it's... not late, the food is still at least mostly warm, but elena almost certainly decided he probably wasn't showing.
when he does finally enter the room he looks—nervous, maybe, if that's a thing she can imagine damon feeling. he avoids looking at her at first, glancing around the suite instead, taking it in, cataloging the differences between what the manor's given her and her room in mystic falls—
and then his eyes light on the bed, and all the food spread over it, and he blinks. ]
I'm pretty sure this is the opposite of portion control, [ he says, though he sounds more amused and delighted than bothered. when he finally meets elena's eyes, his lips have tugged into a smile. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
salt au!!
okay fair enough. i promise. shoot.
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[ he's been ignoring and suppressing his body's hunger cues for nearly 150 years. he has no idea how he's supposed to start listening to them again, or when, to what degree... he's not made for this anymore. ]
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when you get hungry. minimum two times a day, maybe? better if it's three.
you know. breakfast, lunch, dinner?
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[ one bag (or person, you know, whatever you're into) is enough for any vampire, what is this eating multiple times a day?? ]
what about portion control, what's that about
i haven't had to worry about any of this shit in a century and a half, i have no idea what i'm doing
[ and he's panicking a little about it, and he's trusting elena with that panic. don't laugh. ]
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you know. eat and stop when you're full.
( that is not laughing, that is just true. )
look, i'll help you.
OOOOOOOOO you have to try a bunch of stuff to figure out what you like. doesn't that sound fun?
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[ you said it yourself, elena, kids learn this stuff. he's 170 years old! he shouldn't have to learn basic shit like this! ]
if i ate and stopped when i was full as a vampire i'd have killed every human i ever met
i've been ignoring my hunger for one hundred and forty six years, elena
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well, now if you stop when you get full the worst thing you'll do is kill every box of cereal you've ever met. the stakes are a little different.
have you tried? you know. paying attention to when you're full?
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no
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do you think that might be step one?
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want to look like an idiot
kids learn how to do this shit, i should know already
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you can't look like an idiot in front of me. how many times have you seen me be an idiot?
lets take dinner in my room and i'll walk you through it. and if i laugh at you, you can.
i don't know. throw a pillow at my head? is that good, human revenge?
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it'll do for now. we'll come up with something better later.
thank you
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then or now.
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do you prefer me like this
is this better
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on the other hand, it's not really a yes or no answer, to a question as complicated as that. it takes her a minute to text back, because she's thinking about, because she knows what damon wants to hear and knows that isn't what she wants to say. not because it isn't true, but because it isn't the full truth, not wholly.
eventually, )
your vampirism was never the problem. it was how you used it.
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[ of course she would. it'll always be stefan, after all. ]
i didn't want this. i wanted stefan to let me die. i told him to.
[ why does elena get to choose? why does elena's choice to die deserve respect, but his means nothing? why has stefan done this to him twice? ]
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he didn't let you die. that's what happened.
so what are you going to do with that? die or keep living?
( you'll leave me if you die, she thinks. the selfish first instinct of an inherently selfish person. but he's entitled to a decision without her guilt weighing him — she's entitled to hers, too. )
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right? that's what everyone says. death isn't permanent here, you just come back a monster. been there, done that.
aren't you going to tell me i should be grateful? that this is better, stefan did me a favor?
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but i'm grateful. that you're here.
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i'd have come back, even if the bite killed me. he didn't have to do this.
could you love me like this?
don't answer that. ignore me. i'll see you for dinner, bye.
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( what's the right answer — mercy? choosing the thing that keeps the peace and preserves their well-beings, or the thing that's honest? )
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( honest, then. )
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he'll definitely get full, that's for sure.
thumb nail bitten, she waits. does not stare at the door, does not pass go, does not do anything but watch the meal get steadily colder the longer he takes. is this pathetic? she feels a little pathetic. )
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when he does finally enter the room he looks—nervous, maybe, if that's a thing she can imagine damon feeling. he avoids looking at her at first, glancing around the suite instead, taking it in, cataloging the differences between what the manor's given her and her room in mystic falls—
and then his eyes light on the bed, and all the food spread over it, and he blinks. ]
I'm pretty sure this is the opposite of portion control, [ he says, though he sounds more amused and delighted than bothered. when he finally meets elena's eyes, his lips have tugged into a smile. ]
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